I spend a lot of time looking at the absurdities of life. We do and think a lot of things that don’t make sense. We idolize that Hollywood actor but we hold our nose at the guy who cleans our septic tank. Now which one do you think is more vital to your quality of life? We can all name the star quarterback for our favorite college team but how many of us can name the president of that same university? And we do this in almost all aspects of our lives. We don’t concentrate on what’s important and leave certain aspects of our lives to chance.
Best example; picking a spouse. Most employers wouldn’t dream of hiring someone for a long term position without an in depth background check and job interview yet we leave our choice of lifetime partners to chance. That’s why I think people should advertise for mates and do a detailed interview before even considering marriage. As women often have the most at stake, I think they should conduct the interview. As someone who has given this a lot of thought, I’ve developed some questions along with appropriate answers and not so good answers;
Q: What do you do for a living?
POSSIBLE CORRECT ANSWERS: Teacher, lawyer, plumber, welder, doctor, etc.
WRONG ANSWERS: telemarketer, “I’m between jobs right now”, ACORN Field Representative, Chief Safety Officer for British Petroleum.
Q: How long have you been on the same job?
CORRECT ANSWER: For six years. I’ve had two promotions and four raises since I’ve been there.
WRONG ANSWER: Since last Spring. You see I quit my job every Fall when hunting season starts and then I find me a new one every Spring. That way hunting don’t get in the way of my job. I figure that’s the only way to be fair to whoever you work for.
Q: Why do you feel that you would be good at marriage?
CORRECT ANSWER: I’m ready to settle down and build a future with someone I can love and respect.
WRONG ANSWER: Well, I’ve had a lot of experience.
Q: Do you like children?
CORRECT ANSWER: I’d love to have a couple of kids.
WRONG ANSWER: Rugrats? I’m crazy about em. Love to have 10 or 12 of em!
Q: Where do you see yourself 10 years from now?
CORRECT ANSWER: I hope to have a home and family with a little money put away for retirement.
WRONG ANSWER: I’ve always dreamed of being a NASCAR driver, so I’m putting all my money into a car me & my buddies are workin on out back of the house.
Q: What’s your idea of a pleasant evening on the town?
CORRECT ANSWER: After a nice meal in a good restaurant, we might catch a movie or concert and spend the rest of the evening just talking.
WRONG ANSWER: Well, after the wrestling match, we’d grab a case of Old Milwaukee and a couple of bags of pork rinds and go down to the lake and have us a good ol time.
Q: Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
CORRECT ANSWER: Well, I don’t mind being alone but I really like being around other people and being involved in lots of activities.
WRONG ANSWER: I’m not really into any of that kinky stuff.
This is just a sampling of things that you might want to know about someone before you enter into a long term relationship or a legal contract with them. Even under the best of circumstances, marriage is tough and without the proper thought and effort, that wedding ring can turn into a suffer-ring.
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